Funnies: AT&T Customer Support Memo

More Funnies. Not sure where I harvested this, but every time I re-discover it, I get more than a couple chuckles, and remember to share it with a friend.

Now I am sharing it with you.

AT&T Customer Service Memorandum

Please stop submitting compliants. This is our system. We
designed it, we built it, and we use it more than you do. If there
are some features you think might be missing, if the system isn’t as
effective as you think it could be, TOUGH! Give it back, we don’t
need you. See figure 1. Continue reading →

Funnies: Lucas Electronics

I grew up in a weird time. Living in the heart of Silicon Valley (Sunnyvale and San Jose), I was at the epicenter of the rise of tech. But also, I was a car and motorcycle guy.

As such, I was exposed to some oddities and interesting troubleshooting of electrics of various mobiles. One pleasure I never had was owning anything with Lucas electronics, for my auto shop friends in high school would tell hair curling stories. Continue reading →

Good things are coming my way!

Well, I have something VERY Important to say. Apparently, I have some money coming my way, as I have recently received an urgent communiqué from none other than the FED chairwoman, Janet Yellen, herself.

Yessir, the good times are soon to be here in Casa Geoff. As you can see, from the email I have quoted below that it is a Major Award.

From Mrs. Janet L Yellen

Federal Reserve Bank New York.

33 Liberty Street New

York , NY 10045-0001.

United States.

Attention Geoff Anderson,

The bank have re-opened your fund payment file/records again due to the high importance the authority and United States placed on the project that has lingered for too long, your inability to see the efforts and results been posted now and what is obtainable now and before has placed the fund under a serious threat of confiscation by the board. This very amount of $1.6 Million usd is very much available for assessment with the Federal Reserve Bank of America New York City .We want to bring smiles to all over due payments of American and other G7 Community citizens at this financial demanding season of financial year 2016 ending.

We have taken steps been enforced by security investigative agents by inviting you to come down to the bank here in NEW York City USA to iron out security papers issue that will pave way for the deposition or delivery of the fund to you. But all our effort proved abortive due to your past ugly experience but the authority hereby plead for a re-think so that we can cooperate with the bank and have the fund transferred to you.

This payment re-visitation comes up every last financial year. The management will after this very one stop further consultation to you if you fail to clear this fund from our custody and move to take over the financial allocation in order to meet the yearly financial obligation that is highly challenging.

You are hereby advise to give this matter your adequate attention, you will be convinced with the due processing going on and removal of protocols and bureaucracy, this cash flow into your bank account/delivery if you can cooperate with the bank on due processing, it will aide you to revive your financial statue that has been under a serious threat at this festive time ahead. Give us a listening ear and have your fund just like others cleared from our custody.

Waiting for your urgent reply!


Mrs. Janet L Yellen

Federal Reserve Bank New York

I bet you are totally jealous.

(Yes, this was submitted in a form on one of my websites. I guess the scammers are becoming ever cleverer)

When Sarcasm Doesn’t Work

I like to post funny memes to my facebook page. Often they are real, and poke fun at some situation that is bizarre. Sometimes they are complete satire.

There is one class of meme that when I post, inevitably a handful of friends can’t grasp the humor. They make comments like “Who creates these? Who thinks this is right?”

Truth and sarcasm collide
Truth and sarcasm collide

A typical one is this gem. This is sarcasm. I often post sarcasm involving Michelle Bachmann, because it is damn funny.

Of course, a lot of people get butthurt by my obvious sarcasm posts (hint: Anything by the facebook page “Christians 4 Michelle Bachmann” is sarcasm, is patently obvious sarcasm, but is damn funny, so I post it. Even funnier are the people who are on that page who think it is serious.)

Michelle Bachmann is probably the greatest gift, as well as the greatest curse to meme writers and people who practice extreme sarcasm. The reason why is that she says so many batshit, insane, dumb, completely made up (and untrue) things that the reality is far worse than the humor. Every time she opens her mouth, odds are excellent that something completely idiotic will come out.

And people keep putting her on TV, and recording what she has to say.

I guess that makes it hard for people who actually like her to differentiate between the things she says in real life, and the made up sarcasm. BECAUSE IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE.